I wish I could write to the people I love
To tell them what it is like
Inside this head of mine
When it is grey, below, around and above
I struggle with words
I stammer and freeze
I see the herds
And I wonder why I can't be
More like them
Less like me
Liked by them
Liked by me
But words aren't so kind
Nor is this world
They can't read my mind
And I can't write word
So they don't know
And I can't say
What I need to, so
The effort is a waste
And even in this space of mine
A blog to say what I want
I erase all that I type
The very things that I can't
Say freely like the thoughts
That have no barriers when
They are brought
To the people by whom they are read
And so I'm lost in
Saved drafts
Never published
Saved to later delete
So unlike me, who comes out with things I want to say, emotions I want to show, the love I want to shower..... Hardly any draft of mine is unpublished-perhaps only delayed, but only to be released to the world sooner than later. But I will tell you, this urge has brought and kept the best people in my life AND it made me lose the most precious love of my life. I wish I had my feelings in drafts.....not making it to someone's inbox or the heart...
ReplyDeleteActually, my feelings rarely end up as drafts. I either erase them completely, or often, publish them. The words rarely reach the intended people but they are out there. I have lost people too, not solely because I've told them how I feel, but because of what has been said. It's a funny thing. Writing frees you but also sometimes takes from you.
DeleteI do the samething. I have a certain fear of coming out with my real notion at times. I save them as drafts in my heart, not in my blog :) In that case, you are better than me in expressing and outpouring what is in your mind.
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DeleteSometimes it's better to keep things in your heart. I post a lot of things online and these have hurt people I love. I wish I could stop myself from writing poems and blog posts that can be connected to other people. It's a struggle to lock things up.
DeleteYep but we' ll have to struggle and also suffer when gulping our emotions too, while locking up what we really want to express.
DeleteAnyway writers always tend to tell the real truth from their compositions.
Anyway it all depends on how far people understand a writer' s real notion.
In a way we should be free to write anything without fear despite reluctance. Though I believe it, I too always fail to compose my real emotions without fear just like you!