Intrusive

When will it end

These thoughts about death

And when it will happen

And how I will do it

When will I be able to

Enjoy a moment

Without wondering

How I will die and

How I will do it

Pour me another

A shot of arrack

A splash of cola

Was all it took

To get over you

Replaceable

And so it turns out that

It is easier than I thought

To stop loving you.

Dust

On some days

I do not want to move

A limb

I want to lay there

On my bed

And let the mattress

Swallow me whole

I want morning to turn into

Noon and then night

I want days to pass

Seasons to change

Lightning and thunder

Sunshine and rainbows

I want the world to go on

To never stop going in circles

Round and round and round

The sun

And as children grow up

And adults grow old

Trees die

Buildings change

I want to be a girl

Who once refused to leave her bed

And turned into dust

You

I miss you

I miss what we have had

Dead end

You find yourself

Distanced from the crowd

These people you love

Wondering when

You became this unhappy

And that's the moment that

Scares you the most

Because it feels like

There is no coming back

There is no way out of this

Our song 2

It turns out

That I was having a delayed reaction

To what may always be

Our song

Even though

We never danced to it

Or listened to it

More than once

Our song

That one song that was ours

That always reminds me of you

It played among others

And after years of it being our song

Today

It was just a song

Nothing but a fool

Am I being foolish when I hope that this present

that keeps us apart

Will lead to a future in which we are together

once and for all?

dinner

The fork has pierced through the tube-shaped pasta

It sits there, on the plate, surrounded by sauce

And more of the pasta, some sausage too

I look at it and my tummy almost growls

But it doesn't make even a half-hearted effort

To make my hunger known

The fork almost beckons me

Asking to be lifted up from the plate to my mouth

Placed back on the plate after I've pulled the pasta into my mouth

Chewing slowly, swallowing

But my hands are limp in my lap

I want to move them but my mind whispers that

I am just too tired for any of this