eyes half closed

tired
eyes half closed
or half open
maybe both
but they are
tired
tired beyond the
usual tiredness
of having lived
she counts the
days
months
years
how much time
has passed
but her mind
wanders too much
her mind needs sleep
her body
screams for it
one more thing
to do though
leave a message
not for others to know
she lived through the day
just another day
but to remind her self
when things start going
downhill
that on a day of the past
she lived through
something similar
or something
worse
she survived
she was still alive
So eyes
half open
or
half closed
'dear diary'
she writes